A woman who was coercively controlled and repeatedly sexually assaulted by her husband has told a court of “permanent scars” The man subjected his wife to a “prolonged campaign of domination” which culminated in him raping her in June 2021. He cannot be named to protect her identity. The couple met in 2001, have a number of children and are now separated. The man had pleaded guilty to assault causing harm and three incidences of sexual assault. He had pleaded not guilty to rape, coercive control and multiple charges of sexual assault. The offending took place on various dates between August 2020 and June 2021.

Facts of the Case

The court heard that the man was employed in the tech industry and in March 2020 he began working from home. He went on sick leave from August 2020. In August 2020 the man threatened to tell her pastor and family about her vibrator and about “what sort of woman she was”. She later told gardaí this was “the final straw” for her and she decided she wanted a separation. On August 8th, 2020 he slapped her hard in the face in front of her sons. Following that, he called her a “stupid mother who couldn't control her children”. “I concluded that leaving was necessary for the physical and psychological safety of myself and my children." The couple continued to live together but over the months that followed the man repeatedly sexually assaulted the woman. This was often while their children were in the same room. The woman felt it was relentless for her and that it didn't matter how many times she said ‘no’ to him, the court heard.

Rape

The man often told her that she couldn't fight nature. On June 6th, 2021 he sexually assaulted and raped his wife. Later he asked her why she was walking funny and she told him “you really hurt me”. She said she did not consent to the sexual acts. He told her: “you are my wife” and “if you didn't fight it, it wouldn't hurt”. The woman went to gardaí that day and reported the rape and the other sexual assaults and assaults. She told Justice Paul McDermott that the rape was “the apex of a prolonged campaign of domination”. Subsequently, she has been diagnosed with PTSD and struggles with hyper vigilance, intrusive memories and a pervasive sense of anxiety.

Sentencing

Mr Justice McDermott imposed consecutive sentences totalling nine-and-a-half years. He suspended the final 18 months of the term on strict conditions, including that the man engage with the Probation Service upon his release from prison and that he have no direct or indirect communication with his former wife. A post-release supervision order for four years was ordered. Mr Justice McDermott said the offending represented “a severe breach of trust”, that the woman was isolated as it occurred during Covid and that the man “undermined her feeling of safety and security in her own home”. The judge said the man had “total disregard for his wife’s consent” and the offences were both “humiliating and degrading”. “He deprived her of her autonomy and her right to say no,” Mr Justice McDermott said before he added that the man seemed to view intimacy with his wife as “an entitlement”. “I am not convinced he has any real insight,” Mr Justice McDermott said.

Previous Convictions

The defendant has 10 previous convictions for breaches of barring orders relating to his wife on dates from February 2021 to February 2022. Padraig Dwyer SC, defending, said that his client accepts the jury verdicts and is remorseful. He has undergone counselling. The offending took place in the context of the lockdown when many families found themselves “cooped up” together for long periods of time. “These people built a family together and all was well. There was a change of events, and they both ended up in this situation. If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this article, you can call the national 24-hour Rape Crisis Helpline at 1800-77 8888, access text service and webchat options at drcc.ie/services/helpline/ or visit Rape Crisis Help.      Safe Ireland also offers a number of local services and helplines at safeireland.ie/get-help/where-to-find-help/. In the case of an emergency, always dial 999/112. Declan Brennan For the latest Waterford News and Sport, tune into WLR News on the hour and download the WLR App for news on demand.